Why We’re All Lying About Kids’ Movies
Look, I’ve been in this game for 20+ years. Worked with the big guns, the indie darlings, the studio execs who think they know what’s best for our kids. And honestly? We’re all full of it.
Let’s talk about the elephant in the room. The so-called ‘classics’ that get shoved down our throats. You know the ones. The ones that make parents groan and kids zone out after 15 minutes. I’m looking at you, Fantasia.
I remember sitting through that mess at the old theater on 34th Street back in ’98. My friend Marcus—let’s call him Marcus—turned to me at intermission and said, ‘This is what they consider a classic?’ And I was like, ‘Yeah, man. I think we’ve been bamboozled.’
But here’s the thing. We keep pretending these movies are gold. Why? Because some old white guy in a suit said so 50 years ago?
Let’s Get Real About What Kids Actually Like
I’ve got a niece, right? Sweet kid, 8 years old. Name’s Lily. Last time I visited, she dragged me to her room to show me her movie collection. And you know what was on there? Not the usual suspects. Nope. She’s all about Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse. And why? Because it’s got heart. It’s got soul. It’s got action.
I asked her, ‘Lil, what do you think about The Lion King?’ She looked at me like I was crazy. ‘Uncle Joe, that’s my dad’s favorite. It’s boring.’
Which… yeah. Fair enough.
So why are we still pretending that every kid needs to watch every ‘classic’? Let them watch what they like. If that’s Spider-Verse, great. If it’s Frozen, fine. But don’t force-feed them Fantasia just because some guy in a suit says it’s good for them.
But What About the ‘Quality’ Argument?
Oh, here we go. The ‘quality’ argument. You know the one. ‘Back in my day, movies had quality. They had heart. They had meaning.’
First of all, shut up. Second of all, have you even watched a kids’ movie in the last 10 years? I’m not saying they’re all masterpieces, but some of them? They’re pretty dang good.
Take Coco, for example. Beautiful animation, emotional depth, a story that actually means something. And the music? Chef’s kiss.
But no, we can’t just appreciate the good stuff. We gotta complain. ‘Oh, it’s too sad.’ ‘Oh, it’s too scary.’ ‘Oh, it’s not like the old days.’
Newsflash, folks. The old days were not all that. Remember The Black Cauldron? Dark as hell, that one. And don’t even get me started on The Watchers segment in The Secret of NIMH. I still have nightmares.
A Quick Digression: The Gaming Connection
Speaking of scary, have you seen what kids are playing these days? I took my nephew gaming last week—he’s 10, name’s Timmy—and we were playing some new Marvel game. Looked innocent enough, right? Wrong. Suddenly, we’re fighting some demonic creature, and Timmy’s all calm, like it’s no big deal.
I turned to him and said, ‘Aren’t you scared?’ He looked at me like I was crazy. ‘Uncle Joe, it’s just a game.’
Which, okay, fair point. But still. Maybe we should be a little more concerned about what our kids are watching and playing. Just saying.
Where to Find the Good Stuff
So, where do you find the good kids’ movies these days? It’s not easy. You gotta dig. You gotta search. And sometimes, you gotta take a chance.
I’ve found some great stuff on best electronics deals online 2026. Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s a weird place to find movie recommendations. But hear me out. They’ve got this section on the latest tech for streaming, and they always include a list of must-watch movies. Last time I checked, they had a whole list of underrated gems that even I hadn’t heard of.
But here’s the thing. You can’t just rely on some website to tell you what’s good. You gotta do your own digging. Talk to other parents. Ask your kids. Hell, ask your niece or nephew. They’ll tell you what’s worth watching and what’s not.
And if all else fails, just let them watch Spider-Verse. Trust me, they’ll thank you later.
Anyway, I’m gonna wrap this up. I could go on for hours, but I won’t. You’re welcome.
About the Author: Joe Reynolds has been a senior magazine editor for over 20 years. He’s written for major publications and has a strong opinion on pretty much everything. When he’s not ranting about kids’ movies, he’s probably arguing about pizza toppings or the best way to brew coffee. You can usually find him at the local coffee shop, typing away on his laptop and complaining about the Wi-Fi.
